DHA GAY SHIT STORY

2012-01-09T01:24:00.001+08:00

Getting my results in bout 14-15 hours time I guess? Sorta nervous though I know I'm results' gonna be rather horrible. I'm like blogging in the toilet right now while sitting on my precious toilet bowl ahahahahhahaha!

Ok I'm so fat bye.

I screw up every single thing :(

2012-01-08T02:55:00.001+08:00

I lose my friends all the time. *sigh* I'm so lost idk what to do. I hope I can lose myself as well and just die.

Charles Addam!

2012-01-08T02:51:00.001+08:00

Today is Charles Addams' 100th birthday, and how better to celebrate than with a Google doodle? If you head over to the home page today, you'll see the doodle paying homage to Addams' most famous creation, the Addams Family.

2011-12-20T14:33:00.003+08:00

Have been liking this picture since last year man.

2011-12-12T02:09:00.001+08:00

Robert Noyce
Bob Noyce's nickname was the "Mayor of Silicon Valley." He was one of the very first scientists to work in the area -- long before the stretch of California had earned the Silicon name -- and he ran two of the companies that had the greatest impact on the silicon industry: Fairchild Semiconductor and Intel. He also invented the integrated chip, one of the stepping stones along the way to the microprocessors in today's computers.

Have yet to share any special Google homepage in a while have I..

2011-12-08T23:52:00.001+08:00

Google transformed its homepage logo on December 8 to honor what would have been the 125th birthday of Mexican artist Diego Rivera (December 8, 1886 – November 24, 1957).

Born into a relatively affluent fmaily, Rivera studied painting as a child and moved to Europe to continue his studies as a young man. PBS's "American Masters" biography of the artist describes the lasting impact his European education would have on his artistic future

2011-12-08T14:48:00.001+08:00

Have someone ever disappoint you so many time till you'll actually sort of expected it and actually got used to it. Yeah, I have. I have. Always the same'old thing. Well.. this is life isn't it? Sometimes I wish to be a loner with no friends at all..

2011-12-06T15:31:00.001+08:00

2011-12-06T15:29:00.001+08:00

I'm still stupid though

2011-12-06T15:25:00.001+08:00

I'm so depressed every single die I wish I could just die.

2011-10-30T17:31:00.005+08:00

I KNOW I HAVEN'T BEEN UPDATING FOR QUITE SUM TIME. I KNOW :( SO SORRY. I was just so confuse about every single thing that I don't even know what I was actually thinking about.So now I'm like in one of the most depressing state in my life.

Surprisingly.. my tongue piercing have yet to close man. Have yet.. And I certainly do dislike a barbell which is too long! Like the one I'm wearing! Geeeeeeeez

2011-10-07T21:32:00.001+08:00

RIP DUDE.

People usually show their true color after a while. And many lead to disappointment but just those special few will make you just wanna stay.

2011-08-02T20:16:00.002+08:00

Look @my stupid bangs. Seriously. It suck balls

AND THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER!!!!! (Though being fringe-less is quite fugly, atleast it's so much better than having bangssssss x.x)

I am yearning for my babyboy right now :((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( SCHOOL. JUST APPROVE MAN. APPROVE I SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH.

2011-08-01T19:07:00.003+08:00

Today was a rather disappointing day indeed. When I thought that I could FINALLY get to see Benjamin. Turned out that he was still stuck in boy's home. Hah. What to do but to just go on missing him like a mad cow/dog/chicken/duck/baboon. *sigh*
Anyways... I always always always get scolded for skipping lessons. It's not like I can help it either. Lesson ends at 5pm and I'll have to stay back till the school closes at 6.30pm?????? So, if anyone were to choose they'll definitely choose to go home at 1.40pm instead of 5pm or worst still 6.30pm right?!!!!!!!!!!! DUHHHHHHHH~

2011-07-31T18:16:00.003+08:00

WELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had tuition in the morning and I'm so-damn-tireddddddddd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I got my TRIOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so lazy to blog right nowwww. Kkkk, gotta start studying! Xxxxxxxxxxxx

2011-07-30T20:26:00.011+08:00

LOVEEEEEE

ACT ONLYHIGH WEEEBEST FWEN
HI!!!!!!!!!
I'll start blogging since Khoo reminded me of blogspot today. Hoho!
I'm not emotional anymore man. HEHEHEHHEEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!!!!
Was suppose to take some pretty photos @Tanjong Pagar's railway station though I knew that we weren't suppose to even go into the station anymore. Khoo and I climbed into the station and got caught! AHAHHAHA! It was pretty annoying cas we got caught by a fat indian man! The worst part is that when we reached the damn awesome looking abandoned house(?)!!!!!! Damn man! Well, lady luck doesn't seem to be entertaining us today :\

So, went to China Town instead. Walked pretty much and managed to take some good photos I guess...

I-AM-GOING-TO-GO-ON-A-STUPID-DIET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to see Benjamin so bad.

AND BENJAMIN TAN! IF YOU'RE READING THIS POST, I DID NOT BLOODY SMOKE KKKK. IT'S JUST THE SAKE OF TAKING PHOTOS!

2011-07-05T16:36:00.001+08:00

I'm still sad every single day. I bet I hid it well.

2011-06-27T20:20:00.000+08:00

Iron today onwards I will try to be a honest lady and I will not care how others will judge me.

2011-06-26T16:02:00.000+08:00

I always stop blogging after a fucking heartbreak. Sigh.

2011-06-19T18:13:00.004+08:00

Someone told me that it was never love since it faded so quickly. It's just... you like the person cause you think that he or she is attractive.

Everytime I cry, I fucking smile to myself or the mirror fucking hard. Cause smiling releases this awesome shit called endorphins and it makes people feel better, even if it's a fucking fake smile.

2011-06-16T19:10:00.003+08:00

Two weeks ago I was lying to people that I've gotten over you. And I swear it was mother fucking painful to say that, since I've said that I tried fucking hard to do it. I can say that I was fucking strong. I didn't fall back like how I did a month ago. I stood back up.
Two weeks later. I'm fucking over you dudeeeeee! Yay ^^

2011-06-07T22:26:00.000+08:00

I'll be fine once I get it. I'll be good.

2011-06-05T01:16:00.000+08:00

2011-06-03T00:00:00.002+08:00

This is horrible. Khoo's not in Singapore. And I feel so alone. Well, it just feels damn lonely when you know you can't tell Omar, Magg nor Mf or all of the others how you feel. Sometimes... I just want to distant myself from everyone so that I can just be less tired.

2011-06-02T18:08:00.003+08:00

It kills me to know that we're not talking. It's heartbreaking to know that we've faded. It's fucking disturbing that I'm still thinking of you.

2011-05-30T19:54:00.000+08:00

I miss you snoring

2011-05-29T16:11:00.001+08:00

I feel like dying. It has been quite a while. I'm still not moving.

2011-05-29T16:11:00.000+08:00

I feel like dying. It has been quite a while. I'm still not moving.

2011-05-28T08:43:00.000+08:00

Why do I still feel like dying every single day.

2011-05-25T21:15:00.001+08:00

It's time I leave. Leave everything. Just go. Go away.

2011-05-22T17:31:00.002+08:00

I look like I'm gonna die any second. I hope I'll die.
I didn't thought that I needed you that much. Thoughts of you are such bitches I wish I can shoot all of 'em down.

2011-05-19T18:28:00.002+08:00

I'm strong. HELL YES I AM.
But now I need a break. Someone told me that I'm tired already. And I think I really am.

2011-05-18T01:45:00.002+08:00

And all those post from other guys make me look like I'm flirting with them and all but the actual fact is that I didn't even start talking to them. Hah. I would love to explain this shit to you. But I think... It's unnecessary since you don't give a fuck about me anymore and... You just got over me. Hah. This is sad. This is just sad.

2011-05-18T00:50:00.004+08:00

HAHA. HAI. I'm so damn tired today.

I'm not over you yet. I'm so not over you. I didn't hug you today cause I find it difficult. I'm still trying to let you go and what if after I hugged you I'll like you more? That's a definite nono right. So yeah... tsk. Hah.
I have to get over you cause obviously you are over me.
OKKKKKKKK. I SHALL NOT START ANYTHING EMOTIONAL.

I'm like so into fashion design right naow after talking to Minji sooooo much bout it. I wouldn't say that my dressing sense is hell-good. But I know what to wear. But I won't wear it out cause I'm not very skinny and my body isn't really shape-py and I wouldnt look nice in many stuff. So yeah... gotta start a sketchbook like realllll soon and start sewing some stuff and... let' see, make some photo collage.

SO SEXCITINGGGGGGG.

And since I mentioned the word "sex" I AM SO IN NEED OF SEXXXXX. ZOMG. But... I can still control...

I am going to go school late tomorrow, like hell'yeah!

OHYES. HANG OUT WITH KHOO AGAIN TODAY. Wenta study for an hour or so and then headed to Haji to take some photos and then wenta town after that to get some stuff. Had dinner at newton with Ben's clique (for my birthday). After dinner, the sing-birthday-song + cake thingy. HELL, I ALWAYS GET SO DAMN SHY WHEN PEOPLE START SINGING BIRTHDAY SONG TO ME. MY FACE WILL TURN TOMATO RED!!!!!!! My-god.

Kkkkkk. I'm trying to blog happily alr.

I'VE GOT A INDIE PHOTO! ^^

2011-05-17T11:59:00.003+08:00

My mom didn't even call me. No, not yesterday, not today, not the day before. No. Hah.

Created lookbook. I need lose weight fast.

2011-05-16T12:35:00.002+08:00

Fucking depressing

Time check now: 7:39 PM

And now I gotta feeling Khoo's not staying over and Maofeng indirectly told me that he's choosing the boys side. So yeah.

Time check now: 11:09 PM

Why does my birthday have to get worst year by year.

2011-05-15T21:13:00.003+08:00

It's difficult to have to fake a smile every fucking day. I hope the fake smile can become a mother fucking real one. And I'm going to drink my ass off with Khoo and Maofeng. I swear. I just want to black out every night and then wait for the next miserable day to come.

2011-05-15T16:07:00.004+08:00

500daysofbaking:

Mini Oreo Cheesecakes

Ingredients:

15 whole Oreo cookies
6 Oreo cookies coarsely chopped
1/2 cup of sugar
2 large eggs room temperature lightly beaten
1/2 cup sour cream
1 pound cream cheese ( 2 packages of light philadelphia cheese)
1 tsp of pure vanilla extract.
pinch of salt

Directions:

- Preheat the oven to 275˚F. Line a standard muffin tin with paper liners.
- Place one whole cookie in each paper lining.
- In a large mixing bowl, beat the cream cheese on medium high speed until smooth.
- Gradually add in the sugar, mix until very well combined.
- Beat in the vanilla.
- Drizzle in the eggs, a bit at a time, beating to combine.
- Beat in sour cream and salt.
- Stir in the chopped cookies by hand.
- Divide the batter between the cookie filled cups, filling each almost to the top.
- Bake for about 22 minutes or until filling is set.
- Transfer to wire rack to cool completely, and refrigerate for at least 4 hours.

I found this on tumblr. I shall make this for Maofeng on his birthday. Since he loves hand made stuff and that brother has been there for me all the way. And I will be there for him cause he's also having a hard time cause his girlf just got into poly.

2011-05-15T13:01:00.001+08:00

It's a 15th which meant nothing.
I'm dreading for my birthday to arrive. It's gonna be a miserable one.

2011-05-14T14:41:00.000+08:00

:((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
Sad. That's all I can say.

2011-05-14T00:47:00.003+08:00

Mingshan. Don't you just think that you're just an extra shit whom is not even useful at all and just nothing. Well, actually I think so.
Just start doing all the house chores and get busy so that you will not think that much k. Just don't be sad. Just let it go.
Take note: do not blog about how you feel. Blog about what you should be doing. Kkkk, remember ah!

2011-05-12T07:40:00.000+08:00

Goood morningggg. I'm late late late late late late for school cause my alarm didn't ring cause I restarted my phone last night and then I forgot to "agree" with the time which is set on my phone and therefore my alarm didn't ringggggg. And I made up a really great lie so that I don't have to stand infront of the parade square tomorrow. Wuuhoooowuuhhoooo~~ I told the teacher that my dad accidentally knocked onto someone elses car and the owner's making a big fuse about it and that is why I am late. Taaaadaaaahhhhh! (Well since my dad's a unreasonable driver and that always happens)

I'm still so tired. Since when have I not been tired? Like seriously.

Anyways, I hope I can get the job with Khoo man :( I forgot to attach my photo while sending all of our resume. Blurqueen94 manzxc. Argh. Some times being blur myself annoys me. Darn.

Seems like you're over me. Yay?

2011-05-11T10:24:00.009+08:00

Errm. Hi. I keep wanting to text you but I know your replies will be damn sian that kind :( so howwwwww Mingshan howwwwwwww.

Time check now: 4:52 PM

It was a bad idea to even think about texting you when I still feel so awkward towards you and we've got nothing to talk about anymore. Hah. Why do I still like you. When you don't anymore. (I know I've been repeating it. But it's just so true that I just want to type it out so that I can read it in my mind and let myself know that I should let go, but it doesn't seem like it's working) well, doesn't matter does it cause the whole point is that you won't want to get back with me and that's the end of the story.

I'm so-damn-tired today and I have got no idea why. And the weather's killing many people *poooooffff* sooo-ohhh-hottttttt!

Time check now: 7:42 PM

Whoa, my feet's really killing me :( HOW TO WEAR LOVELY SHOES :((((((
AND TALKING ABOUT SHOES! I'm gonna get wedgessssss! YIPEEEDOOO!!!

OR

YAY! Then I can wear it on Miss Chern's wedding day ^^ but my stupid feet needs to heal fasttt!!! Argh. Damn.

AND THEN... SHOES LINKED TO SOCKS!
My dad went to Thailand (LIKE YES, AGAIN AGAIN) and both my dad and I wear the same kind of socks. And then HE HAS GOT HIS OWN PAIR (MORE OF LIKE PAIRS) AND HE STILL WAKE ME UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHEN I WAS SO-GOD-DAMN-TIRED AND ASKED ME FOR MY SOCKS! AND HE TOLD ME THAT HE DIDN'T WANT THE OTHER COLOURS BUT WHITE. AND WHEN I OPEN HIS CUPBOARD TODAY, I SAW SO MANY PAIRS OF SIMILAR SOCKS WHICH ARE NEW! My-god. My dad really... has got nothing better to do but to wake his daughter up in the middle of the night just to borrow socks from her.

This one's cool too! The lady will slowly dance till there's four of her! Sweeet!

Martha Graham, the U.S. choreographer who helped to pioneer modern dance, would have been 117 today.
And to mark the anniversary, she has been celebrated by Google's third doodle of the month so far, which is another animated one.
The doodle shows dancers performing a series of flowing, emphatic Graham-esque moves. The whirling trails of their limbs spell out the six letters of the search engine's name.

I'm scared that you'll forget about me.

2011-05-10T08:47:00.003+08:00

Morning world! Omg, I need to go back to sleep man. So-tired.
I think I feel happier today cause he called last night. (Ok. I think I'm a pervert) but seriously, it was nice hearing his voice. Hah.

I'm so dead for practical later on and I'm still in bed! Hahaha! Yay! ^^
Okkkie dokiee I shall blog later. Tooddddllesss

Time check now: 9:10 PM

Zomg. Priest is showing tomorrow and Final Destination is gonna be showing soon *shakes butts*

I'm still not over you. And you're confuse. And I'm still hanging on to nothing. And you can just let go anytime. What to do. So sad uh. Hah.

I'm watching some Paris Hilton show. Hahahaha! I don't know to laugh or to think that I'm weird. I think I'm watching it cause I'm so damn amazed by how plastic she is. Whoa.
My feet feels horrible cause of the boots I wore yesterday :( it's kind of infected. Argh. It's pretty bad actually. Because it's like really really blistered feet :(

2011-05-09T00:35:00.010+08:00

HAHAHAHAHA! OMGZZXCX. THE CUTEST GOOGLE'S HOMEPAGE RIGHT! :)
It's the 76th Birthday of Roger Hargreaves! (THE LITTLE MISSS ... OR MR ..., those whereby you see people wearing those shirts around!) YAY! SO CUTE ^^
I feel happy when I google cause the homepage is so cute! HAHAHAHA! I'm retarded.

Time check now: 10:15 AM

These few days were extremely bad. I kept on thinking back. If I've been a better girl. Would all of these have happened?
I thought bout my first kiss to you. HAHA! So awkward eh.
I thought bout your dragon boat competition. You told me not to go but you wanted me to be there so bad but I didn't turn up and you were quite sad bout it cause other's girlf came. And I really felt bad about it cause as your girlf how can I not be there for you!
I thought bout the times where you always always said that you'll pick me up after work but failed to do so most of the time and I was pretty sad bout it but I'll still end up meeting you and that is all that matters! ^^
And I remember that you told me that you were gonna die soon (cause you were coughing really badly at that period of time) and I actually believed! How stupid right! And I even cried! OMG. So silly.
I remember before you went to Phuket then we were celebrating Lisa's, Ken's and Ws's birthday and I already miss you damn badly and wanted to ask you not to go to Phuket man. AND YOU READ MY TEXT TO YOU. Omg. So annoying. And then Yolanda kept saying that we look alike and I was like acting "GOT MEH?!!" But inside like happy only :)
I thought bout you always getting pissed off with me for being blur and clumsy. Then I'll be damn sorry for being that way.
I thought bout you calling me pager cause I always always always don't pick up my phone cause my phone's on silent mode! Hahahaha!
I thought bout the first time we had sex (WHICH WAS REALLY REALLY FAST, I was with you for like... not long right!) and that love-making session lasted for hours man.
I thought bout the times where by I'm always "sian sian" and you'll keep finding ways to cheer me up.
I thought bout how you like to pull your boxers down and show your butt off to me and shake it. AHAHAHHA! My-god.
I thought bout nice having you around was.
Actually, I didn't thought bout all these. I miss all of these. Great, I was smiling while thinking and now I wanna cry. K, bai.

Time check now: 1:52 PM

WTHECK MAN. I'm already semi-naked in my room and I'm still perspiring. Damn, the weather's a bitch isn't it. SAVE ME~~~~~

I acted like you're not important at all.

2011-05-08T08:55:00.007+08:00

I pity that poor Mingshan.
She still wants to be there for you. She really do.

BLOODY SHIT. I FORGOT TO COLLECT MY AVRIL TICKETS. FUCK.

Yesterday's run was pretty good actually!

2011-05-07T00:32:00.012+08:00

Hai. Actually I feel rather down today.
I miss you the most most most most most on friday cause it's usually the best day of the week cause I will get to see you after days of shit. And I'll like act like meeting you is a really normal thing but inside me I'm like "YAY! I'm with Ben! YAY! As long as I'm with him anything also can la ^^" But yeah. I haven't been seeing you for three weeks now. You've already moved on and obviously I do not want to interrupt.
Some times I wish I can just call you and shout "I LOVE YOU ASS" but yeah. I don't think I'll get the chance to
And ah... When you text me first then I'll go "omg!!!! Yay!!!! Ben texted me first without me initiating the text first! Yayyy!!!!!!!!!!" I know I'm a nuts kid :/
Just now I was just explaining to you why I went to deadmau5 and you thought that I was boasting (I think) But I really really didn't boast. I just wanna explain to you :( But why did I even bother explaining
when I don't have to. Hah. BUT... I really never flirt around :( I think about you whole day long. I think about you like every mother fucking second. Seriously. I... think of you when I do everything. When I eat, when I shit when I sleep (I SERIOUSLY DREAM OF YOU ALMOST EVERY FUCKING NIGHT. I dreamt of you bald (with Deepak, I dreamt of your stupid-cute-heart-melting-adorable-irresistible smile), I think of you when I'm in school. I even think of your monthsary whenever I write the date :( *sigh* I really wanna know how you feel... But what if it's something bad. Kkkk. I'd rather not know how you feel.
I really really really miss you like some mad cow Ben...
Some how I wish that you're still reading my blog so that you can know how I really feel and how fucking much I miss you. But on the other hand I'd rather you not cause you're gonna feel all guilty again. And I don't want anything to pull you down like that.
How I wish I can get a great big hug from you and that will assure me that everything's gonna be fine even if the sky is falling.
I really want you back so bad... so bad...
Why did I choose to love you.

OKKKKKKKKK. MINGSHAN. PLEASE STOP. TALK ABOUT DEADMAU5!!

Kkkk. Deadmau5 was quite ok. But it was rather boring as well cause the music are draggy and the same thing will repeat for too long and yeah. But overall I'll give it a 4/10? (Sorry, I'm giving my best alr)

AND TOMORROW I'M GOING FOR MY NIKE RUN!!!!!! WEEEEEE. Gonna town first before the run with Khoo again! She's like the only one for me now :')

Oh dear. I hope you can tell me that you have got no feelings for me at all and you just wanna be friends with me cause you pity me. Just tell me that and I'll go. I'll fuck off right away.
I gave up the first time round. This time I won't, until you tell me so.
Actually I've got this very strong feeling that you've already gotten over me cause you'v stop calling (I KNOW I TOLD YOU THAT I WILL BE VERY SAD IF YOU'VE CALLED BUT... nevermind)

2011-05-06T06:05:00.002+08:00

I used to wake up feeling happy. Now, I just feel empty and sad. Hah.
I'd rather die than to continue feeling this way. I'd rather die than to having to cry almost everyday.
I'm really getting very pissed off with myself. Really.

Time check now: 3:18 PM

Holy shit. I feel fat right now. Omgzxxccc. Geeez. Die. I'm fat. Look at me! I'm fat! Omg! Fucking shit! Kkk. Tomorrow I'm going for my nike run tomorrow. I will burn some fats tomorrow and feel less guilty kk. (I'm like just consoling myself. Wtf)
Anyways, I'm soooooo boreeeed. I'm waiting for khooooo. I'm freezinggggg. My buttock hurtssss. I feel damn sleepy. I don't if we should go for deadmau5 tonight. I need to get a job near my place. I want to keep myself busy. I want to get over you if not I'll die. Life just suck (my standard line)

2011-05-05T23:03:00.000+08:00

My pathetic little Mingshan.

2011-05-05T07:56:00.010+08:00

This is is is... egg cookies!!!!!!! One of my favourite munchiesssss.

Gooooddd morrrrningggg woorrrrllllddd ^^
I love it when I can sleep for such a long time. I love it I love it I love it. I love it when I don't have to think. Ohh-emmm-geeee. I love it ^^ it has been a while since I've gotten so much sleep.
Anyways, khoo texted me that she has deactivated facebook as well so that she can concentrate on her studies. How I wish my reason was the same as her. And not because "I deactivated facebook just to aviod your name dangling round my page" and everyonce in a while I'll feel like I wanna activate my account but I've already endured for so long. It's like everytime I feel like smoking, I've already endured for so long, not smoking. How can I waste my effort righttt?????? So, the main point is... NOT TO ACTIVATE FACEBOOK. End of story.
Kkk. See what I mean? The moment I wake up, I think of you. Which is extremely annoying. Could have at least let me brush my teeth first and wash my face and take my shower and have my breakfast then only I'll have to start thinking of you. But too bad it doesn't work like that.
Pooooffff. I still feel damn tired. I shall go and sleep for another half an hour or so.

Time check now: 7:18 PM

I hate it when I know I'm not yours anymore. Bloody hate it. K, whatever. Since you've already gotten over me and moved on. I should to. I don't exist in your mind anymore so you shouldn't exist in mine too. Fair and square! Cheh.

POA PAPER REALLY SUCK BALLSSSSSSSS! REALLY DO.

Actually I'm too sad to blog right now. Maybe tomorrow. Bai.

I FIND THIS MOTHER FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING HOT! GODZZZZ *MELTS* That woman sure have balls man. A mother fucking pussy piercing. Damn I'm inspired. Lol.

I'm wanna get this on my birthday! YAY!

2011-05-04T08:06:00.005+08:00

I've read the news about how Osama died. (Well, since I'm going to school by myself today and travelling on the train is getting more and more boring)
So... How did he die?

Osama Bin Laden was unarmed when he was shot by US forces in Pakistan, but he resisted efforts to capture him alive, US officials say

US forces had faced immediate and sustained resistance from many other people in the compound who were armed, the White House adds

Bin Laden was killed in a raid by US special forces on a compound in the Pakistani city of Abbottabad, some 100km from Islamabad. His body was buried at sea

The US is hesitating over releasing a picture of Bin Laden's body which is described as "gruesome"

White House counter-terrorism adviser John Brennan says material seized during the raid in Abbotabad could provide leads to the whereabouts of Ayman al-Zawihiri, thought to be al-Qaeda's deputy leader

Follow live coverage on BBC Urdu , BBC Arabic and BBC Persian

Live page reporter: Michael Hirst

All times BST (GMT+1)

(I copied and paste cause the person has to be credited)

Time check now

Kk. My history paper really really suck big time. I really have got no knowledge at alllllll. Goodness.

~~I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you~~
~~I need you I need you I need you I need you I need you I need you I need you I need you~~
~~I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you~~

I envy how my girlfs can text their boyf during school times. Hah! I'm nuts again. Danggggg.

Time check now: 3.20 PM

YAY! I made my first tumblr quote! No copying. No nothing. I swear! ^^ I would be nice if I've got many many followers and people starts reblogging my stuff. Aww. It'll not happen. I'm dreaming! Haha! Kkkkkk. Gonna chiong my maths first.

Some times I think I'm pathetic.

2011-05-03T20:32:00.002+08:00

Time check now :6:09 AM

I wish that you'll tell me that you want me to leave you alone cause I will. I don't want to screw up any further.
I think I've become so emotional that it is creeping me out and I actually fear of what I will become.

Anywaysssss... I had the left over cake as breakfast! I quite like that cake actually. It's blueberry maple syrup cake! Awesome or what righttttttt! I'm not a fan of blueberry but I'm definitely a HUGE fan of maple syrup! (Imagine the thick syrup lying on top of your pancakes and slowly... Your pancakes are absorbing the syrup in and that's when you start digging in! And you'll dip your pancake into more maple syrup cause it's never enoughhhhhhhh *droooool*) ok. I describe things pretty badly :L
Ok. I will try to post happy stuff, food stuff, whatever stuff k. Just not emotional stuff. *sigh*

Time check now: 1:26 PM

Actually I think I'm getting more lonely. I've been blogging more and more and talking less and less. That's pretty saddening. Hah. Anyways, I'm having my maths paper at 2 and I forgot to bring my jacket along. Zomg. I'm gonna freeze to death. Zomgzomgzomg. And it's a two hours paper! Darn. Had physic earlier. Kinda sucked. Don't really know much of those theory stuff but I didn't study at all. So yeah. Good luck to me.

Time check now: 8:29 PM

I don't know how much I need you.

KKKKKKKKKKKKK. I think this is one of the cutest from SKILLEX (Y)

LOL. I feel so smooth after shaving. All thanks to my dear Maggie for influencing me to shave. Tyvm. (now she's shaving like a mad cow, like me!) HAHAHAHAHHA!
I kept on losing my contacts these few weeks and it's like newly opened ones :( This really really sucks. Tsktsktsk.
Ate A LOT today, when I say A LOT. I really really mean it. I had laksa after my first paper and then after my second paper I had curry puff, fried squid (I don't eat squid at all but this one's exceptional man) and then the XXL fried chicken cutlet! HEHE. ALLLLL FRIED STUFF. I KNOW. FAT. How am I suppose to lose weight!!!! Damnnnnnn.
There's only one paper tomorrow! Wuuuhoooo. Uh-huhhhh! *shakes butt* WHICH MEANS I'LL END AT 10.45! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~
Oh yes! I've deactivated my facebook account just to avoid seeing your name dangling around my page so that I won't have the urge to check out on you since I haven't do that for like idk how long until yesterday and that's when I think I should just quit everything which will remind me of you. That way... I can get over you fast *cheeeesseee* And since there won't be any facebook for a while, I'll be blogging even more! Ah, blogging's nice actually... I get to talk a lot here (k. I meant type).

OMG. I NEED TO TANN. I'm so fair right nowwwww. I want my tan marks back!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH. MUST-GO-TANNING-SOON! I WILL GO!

Shall go and watch some show right naowwwwwww.
Me lika cool kid onlyyyyyy. K. Lame/stupid.
Bai.

2011-05-02T23:30:00.009+08:00

I miss being on the same bed with you.
I shouldn't have watched "No Strings Attached" :(
I miss watching movies on your bed with you.
I miss everything about you.
How bout you.

2011-05-02T05:03:00.012+08:00

Why do I have to wake up with fear every morning. Afraid that you might like someone else or have already forgotten bout me (don't fucking ask me why I am so fucking scared of this because I've got no fucking idea either) Why. Why am I waking up at some mother fucking wrong timing and will just cry to myself. Why does it have to be so fucking horrible. Why can't I get over this.

Time check now: 9:39 AM

Good morning? Dang. It's gonna be a bad day today. I know it.
Anyways, it's dad's birthday today. Well... Happy birthday! Yay?
I'm on my way to my teacher's place right now (god-damn-tired. How can I not be tired when I only get 5 bloody hours of sleep everyday)
My contacts dropped (to-I-don't-know-where) when I was bout to put it on and I ended up wearing spects instead since I'm late. And since I'm late I didn't shower at alll!!! I forgot to put some perfume as well. I just brushed my teeth. I think I stink big time.
And I think I forgot to tell my parents that I'm having tuition today. So they might start panicking and thinking that I've gone missing. Doesn't really matter. It's not like I talk much now adays. They'll understand right. Ah shit! I forgot too pee as well. My bladder's gonna burst. Geeeeeeez.

Imy so damn much that I can die man. Hah

Kkk. My phone's battery is gonna die pretty soon and I'm still blogging. Darn. I'll probably blog more laterrrrrrr. Tooooodddddllllleeesssss

Time check now: 2:18 PM

HAAAALOOO!!!!! I like always at home and everyone has gotten into their new school and they just forget bout you. But oh well. I cam whore all day long... THIS-IS-HOW-LIFE-LESS-I-AM. My my... it's idiotic.

Fucking slutty
Notice the annoying bloodshot eye ball? (at the side)
This shows how much braces are needed.LOOK! I BLEACHED MY HAIR GREEN ^^ (Y) Nahhhh, just kiddin'! Those are extensions :/
I LOVE THIS ONE THE MOST! Wuuhooooooo~

This is one of my favourite from Breaking Benjamin.

ZOMG. I REALLY LOVE SKRILLEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God-dammit. They're awesome!

I hope people like Jevon can leave me alone. My heart's still with someone else. I'm not over it. I really really have this fucking thought of dying. Cb

2011-05-01T01:23:00.006+08:00

I feel like dying right now (nahh, not really die but yeah)
How can I stop talking to someone that I missed and loved so much. How. But yeah, I'm gonna do it. I just... Don't know what to do. Does it matter now. It doesn't.
I'm done crying. It'll be my last time.

Time check now: 11:29 AM
MORNINGGGGGGGGGGG! ^^ My parents shocked me cause they told me that they've been watching MTV and my dad likes the "money money" song and my mom knows who lady gaga is

Time check now: 11:04 PM

*sigh* I feel damn retarded. I kept on blogging and blogging and blogging cause I don't know who to tell all of these to. Hah.
Xavier called with a very weird number and wanted to loan some $$$ from me.
I haven't been sleeping well. And I feel like dying the whole time. This is horrendous and it should stop. I look like some sort of drug addict :S

CHECK OUT MY OH-SO-AWESOME CENTER PARTING STYLEEEEE ^^

2011-05-01T00:36:00.006+08:00

I THINK YOU MUST BE THINKING THAT HAN MING SHAN IS NUTS. MAD NUTS.

ANOTHER GOOGLE CUTE HOMEPAGE! THIS ONE'S REALLY CUTE! THERE'S A MAGNIFYING GLASS THERE ^^ REALLY, YOU CAN MOVE THE MAGNIFYING GLASS ALL OVER THE CARTOON! Interesting eh.

HEHE... It's... the 160th Anniversary for the First World's Fair!!!!!!! ^^
Wiki didn't summarise anything bout this and gave lots of historical information which is probably just history...

I AM SO DEAD HUNGRY RIGHT NOAW! I WANT FOOD. I WANT SUPPER.

2011-04-30T00:47:00.012+08:00

I feel so heartbroken right now I don't know who to tell. Who can I tell? No one knows that I'm this upset. I can't let anyone else know either. Cause no one is suppose to know. Everyone else knows that I'm strong. HELL YES I AM. I just... I just need to get over this quick. I want it to go away quick. I want to stop crying like that. I want to be happy again. Because I'm sick of acting strong and happy. Everyone I'll accidentally cry (when I don't even have the intention to) and then when people notice it I have to make out all sort of stupid lies like "nonono! Hahahahaha! Why the hell would I be crying???? My contact lens tore in my eye and it's hurting like a bitch! Hahaha!" Imagine, how tiring this can be when all you want is to just get over it. GET OVER IT. Understand??!!!!! Argh. I used to be to sad bout this but now... I am pissed and sad. Wtf man. I think I'm sick of this.

__ __

Argh. All alone at my place right now cause everyone else has gone to the hospital with my sissy. She's gonna be ok so I'm not as worried. I promised her that I'll bring her to the movies once she recovered. It's been a while since I last brought her to the movies. Hah. I used to bring her out all the time. But now it seems like I've hardly got time for her. And I just saw how pretty and sweet and beautiful she is when she was talking to me. Awww. So cute :) kkkk. I don't dare to sleep cause I'm alone. Ahhh. Damn. But I chose to be alone anyways. So yeah. Night

Time check now: 8.48 AM

Omgggg. I'm meeting Khoo later on for lunch! Like finally! ^^ but she'll only be free till four which means I'll be all alone at four again. I feel like hanging out Angela but nahh, cause they're like more of clubbing than hanging out and most of them stays in the east and I can't possibly go to the east all the time right:\

Hah. I'm meeting khoo at the cathay. Where... me and you kind of first dated right. OR is it not a date. Hahaha! I was so shy then... my god.

Time check now: 11:54 PM

MET KHOO THE WHOLE DAY INSTEAD ^^ Towned, ate, shopped, bought, walked, homed. I'm like a WATER TANK today! Why?!!! Cause I'm extremely thirsty today! And I don't have a single clue why the heck am I so thirsty either. And then I've finally gotten the demin shorts which I wanted. Though it didn't really turned out to be the one I really really wanted but after a few washes it'll be looking better I guess :O And khoo went to get her fred perry top and this sales guy was like extremely nice to us man! He offered us his stuff discount when we don't even know him at all! What a Mr nice guy right! Thank god there's still people like him around, if not the world would be dead. Cause it's filled with selfish people. Even myself, I think I'm selfish.

And dad wasn't in a good mood again, today. So he accused me of something. And I was so upset about it I ran out of my house crying. Mother fucking gay. I know. It's not like I want to be gay. Who the hell wants to be gay?! Seriously. I just couldn't take it. My life has been like shit and I'm just so... broken already. I just hope that I can be spared from this agony. Cause it's horrible. I think I'll really jump of the building if Amanda Khoo isn't there for me. Hah. Get over it. End of story. People got over it and have already moved on. Kkkkk. SMILE. DON'T BE SAD :))))))))))))))))) *CHEESE*

I wanna get happy socks! Maybe I will feel happier if I wear them!

OHYESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S.......................
PARAMORE SHIRT DAY TODAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! \m/ \m/

BE HAPPY!

2011-04-29T07:03:00.009+08:00

Well. I think I forgot to blog bout this yesterday... I've got this teacher. (I think she's really really free and has got nothing better to do) and she wanted us to clear all the books under our table. And so... Like you know, people like Mingshan couldn't be bothered with shit like that and she didn't clear her books. And the teacher went to throw all of those books which were still under the table into a thrash bag. Like wtf right? Our text books man. And she went to throw my skirt away as well. Two of my skirts in fact (I realised it this morning that's why I'm blogging about it. The books thing didn't really bother me much but the skirt YES) goddammit. This is the reason why I will go around telling people I abhor ytss. I seriously feel like cursing like some bitch. But nahhhhhh. I'm gonna keep my cool. Kkk.
Can't wait for exams!

Time check now: 6.33 PM

SO. YOU MUST BE WONDERING HOW WAS MY PAPER TODAY RIGHT? Well... honestly speaking... I was much better than yesterday's though I know I won't be able to pass it. But still... it was definitely better! At least I didn't submit a blank paper which will make a teacher go *O.O* So yeah :))))) *CHEESE* <-- I was just acting cute. Please excuse-me.
THERE'S NO SCHOOL ON MONDAY. HAPPY OR WHUAT! ^^
Kkkk. I need to shit right naow.

I KNOW THIS HAS BEEN OUT FOR QUITE SOMETIME ALREADY. BUT IT'S STILL ONE OF MY FAVOURITE ;)

I'd prefer this one to that (IT'S STILL THE SAME THING FYI*) it's just that the top one jump straight to the climax. So... it's like no kickkk. Then at least this one has got a lil boring start *wriggle eyebrows*

AND... the original song sounds quite ok as well . Embedding was disable by the owner. So I couldnt share the original song + video here :( AWW MAN!

If I'm an open blogger. I'll blog bout food. Music. And I'll do many many many interesting stuff and try to promote my blog and then hope I'll have many many manyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy readers and I can get to earn some $$$! HAHAHAHA. I'm just dreamingggggggggg, again ^^

I'm going to stop contacting you

2011-04-28T12:53:00.006+08:00

Kk. Mingshan is always caught in a delimma if she should text Ben or not. Why???? Cause she finds it really difficult to text him. *sign*
Having my break right naow. Chinese paper suck my ballssssss. Argh. Total killer man. Chemistry up next. Even worst. Definitely dead x.x

Time check now: 5.50 PM

I HAN MING SHAN FEEL LIKA BOSSS. HAHAHAHAHA! I'm eating one HUGE BOWL of spicy udon and gonna watch PLL ^^ (kkk, it's just the bowl is super huge. Not udon kkkk! And it would've tasted better with kimchiiiiiiiiiii)
I flunk chemistry pretty badly. Hah. This is depressing.

Why do I still have time to think bout you. Seriously. My mind should be filled with school, girlfs, new eye candies, new boys. Then why not. Hah. Sometime I really wish that I'm some player. At least players don't have to feel horrible. This is shit.

SO...

Now you must be wondering why I am this bimbotic right! HAHA! I'm notttttt. I'm just showing off my favourate food! I bet many didn't know that I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEE BREAD! At frist I thought bread's gonna like be my favourite food for like... just a while and I'll get bored of it. BUT... after so many years. I STILL LOVE'EM. IT'S LIKE THE BEST THING ON EARTH. ZOMG. From cheap breads to expensive ones. I love them all. OMG. BREAD. HAHAHA. I'm insane again! I love bread. I love food which are made out of flour... like... pasta! They are like wheat flour right? And... wraps. And... thosai! And pizza! And OMG. SO MANY MORE. WHOA.

2011-04-27T06:39:00.009+08:00

I'm like blogging so damn early. Of course. Since it's... Nevermind. Life just suck.
I had snacks in the middle of the night cause I was so-damn-hungry!!!!! Hahaha! Fat Mingshan. K. Lol. Lame.

After people know that you're single everyone will start popping out and talk to you. Like you're free of charge. Halooooooooo~ not free of charge man. Dammit.

Did you know that the more you call, the more you care the more you try to make me happy the more I'll feel... Heartbroken/sad/depress/etc etc. I don't know what you're thinking. I don't know what's on your mind. I don't know if we'll get back or anything. I don't know if you've actually let go of everything. I just know nothing. And you've got my blog to read cause I rant out every shit here. Shit which I cannot tell my friends. And you get to read it. You somehow know what's going on. But I've got no idea what the heck is going on at your side. And I don't have any rights to know anyways, I'm not your girlf I'm just your friends. Friends don't ask a friend how their school are scheduled . What their plans are. (Okkk. I'm going too far, way to far... I should stop making everything sound so sad)
It somehow it feels like you're just showing sympathy.

Kkkkkkkkkk. Will blog lataaaaa. Super hungry again. Gonna get my butt off to yishun right nowwww (I'm actually late) for breakfast. Haven't been talking much in school lately. I wanna try talking to my girls. Kkkk. Xxxxxo

Holy shit. I've been falling asleep so much in class and I've got this stupid irritating annoying habit of making noise when I am ASLEEP is embarrassing me. Shit. Sososo stupid *Shy* :(

Timecheck now: 6.55 PM

I've been skipping tuition lately, for like three lessons already. Don't ask me why. I just don't feel like going. *sign* anyways, stayed back in school (FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME) to revise. Quite productive I can say. So, I'm heading home right now. Mrs Samuel's pretty kind hearted, she gave us a lift to northpoint cause I was raining damn heavily. While other students have to get drench in the rain. Ikr! Lika boss onlyyy. (Oh shit! I'm being irritating) so yeah, tiring day. Not-enough-sleep. Staying up late too much just to watch PLL (pretty little liars)

Haven't meet my dear Khoo for a week already. Tsktsktsk. Cannot laugh :(

I am not up for grabbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb. GO-AWAY. Life sucks.
I WANT A DR. MARTENS! HAHA. K. I'm nuts.

2011-04-26T06:57:00.003+08:00

So, I'm dreading for the day to end when it haven't even started. Hah. Ikr (everyone's saying thissss. Pleaseeeeee spare meeeeee)
Why do I still cry. Time should have helped, seems like it didn't.
I'm having my exams today. Wellllllll, all the best to memememememe! I guess...
Hooo-kay. Toodlesssssss
Xxxxxoo

Kkk. I'm back to updateeeeee!
Timecheck now: 6:33 PM

Hooo-kayyy... Well, had my first paper today. Really suck balls. My composition was badly written. I suddenly went out of ideas and made up something which is stupid/kiddy/predictable. Shit right! Arghh. But I hope paper two will help to pull my marks up :/
Now I've got no one to share my sad/bad/good/stupid happenings with. Hah.
Kkkkkkk. Soooooo... I haven't had anything proper for quite a while! So I am going home right now to happy my oh-so yummy bee-hoon! Hahaha! Ikr, you must be thinking "been-hoon only what! What's so good about that?" It's actually damnnnnn goooddd pleaseeeeeee. I'll prolly shower first and have dinner while watching pretty little liars! Lika boss onlyyyyyyy. Shiokkkkk notttttt ;) hahahaha! I'm like ignoring exams and actuing like a bossss. Awesome!

I MUST BE REALLY LAME TO BE ALWAYS TALKING BOUT GOOGLE'S HOMEPAGE. YES I AM LAME. I AM BORED. I AM LIFELESS :(

So, what about today's google's homepage!

The search engine featured images from the pioneering ornithologist’s popular 19th Century prints to mark his 226th birthday.
Birds of prey, songbirds and a watchful owl replaced Google’s distinctive logo on the doodle.
The son of a French sugar plantation owner in what is now Haiti, Jean-Jacques Audubon emigrated to America at the turn of the 19th Century and made his name studying and recording the country’s bird life.
He set himself the challenge of painting North America’s bird species in greater detail than ever before.
A keen hunter, he earned the nickname the "American woodsman" in Europe, symbolising the frontier spirit of the United States to many.

2011-04-25T10:32:00.004+08:00

Isn't it sad when people have this short conversation with me.
A: Mingshan! Your boyf's in simei ite???!!!
Me : Errm, we broke up. But yeah, he's in simei.
A: Oh. I'm sorry.
Me. It's ok it's ok :) (when it is actually not ok at all. How I wish I could reply my friends like that instead: "Yeahyeah!!!! He's in simei! Why you saw him ah???? Hahahaha!"

Kk, this seems sad. Hah.

My dad just kinda vend his anger on me. Whoa, it's somehow pretty annoying and I feel like punching his face hard. But yet, on second thought. It seriously doesn't bother me that much. I feel like punching his face cause he is shouting way too loudly and it's really really annoying. And the brillant part is that, he was joking with someone else down stairs. Okok, actually it's really no biggy. But why must he shout that loudly? I seriously don't get it.

I promise myself that I'm going to bed by 8 tonight. Seriously.

I wanted to post this on Khoo's facebook cause I looked rather happy right! Like really really happy! Hah. But some how I look retarded. And why faked something which I'm not.

2011-04-24T16:28:00.002+08:00

Fuck emotions.
Fuck missing you.
Fuck wanting to kiss you.
Fuck wanting to cuddle with you.
Fuck wanting to kill every girl you talk to.
Fuck jealousy.
Fuck this.
I’m so tired of feeling like this.
I'm so tired of wanting to be with you.
Fuck this.
I’m tired of it.

2011-04-24T13:35:00.006+08:00

I tried not to blog bout all these sad stuff. But if I don't blog. I've got no one to tell. I still don't understand why I'm still so-god-damn sad. It has been more than a week hasn't it. I feel weird with my friends. I just feel like being alone all the time.
I miss traveling really far just to see you. My finger tips miss running/gliding down your nose so-oh-gently. I miss eating with you. Now every meal seem so lonely.
(you must be thinking that I'm that freaky ex whom is thinking of you every single day like a psychotic fagg cunt) But how did you let go so quickly. I want to do it too.

I just realised that Khoo is one of the author of my blog as well. So no point making it "for author only" right. Stupid girl here.

Kkk, I'm reaching home soon. I've been cabbing quite a lot. Don't like the feeling of traveling alone for a long period of time. Hah. Everything seem so alone.

Step mom wants me to go to a fortune teller. K, maybe more of a future teller. I'd rather give it a miss. My life is so miserable right now I wouldn't want to know anything more.

I lost my wallet yesterday while I was at Tampines with Nichelle and co. Hah. And I seriously thought that how can my life get any worst. And then they called the people there or something and told me that they've found my wallet? Hah, I don't feel any sense of relief at all. I think I'd rather lose my wallet. Actually, I knew that something dropped but I was just happily watching my movie with Nich, I guess. Hah.

2011-04-23T06:18:00.002+08:00

I thought you would want me back. I really thought you would. I guess you didn't love me that much after all.

If that day, I've said "I need you, I am really scared to lose you. Please don't leave me kk" instead of "I think we should break up, it's not working for us blahblah" I would still have you today and I could have still felt you, hold you. Haha. I dug my own grave. I deserve to feel as horrible as I am now.

I swear I need you.

2011-04-23T01:40:00.001+08:00

I ENDED UP STAYING AT HOME. ^^

2011-04-23T00:31:00.004+08:00

Dear Ben,

I finally know how you feel, partly I guess. (If you're reading, please stop reading after you've finish this post k, really. Don't vist my blog anymore. I'm serious!!!! If not I'll get mad ah I tell you! Cas it'll make you feel really guilty. I don't want you to live in guilt babe.)

You cried when we broke up. Your friend was busy consoling you. You feel guilty but you know it is for our own good and you really want me to move on even though at times you want to get back with me.

I'm sorry. It's not easy for you as well. I really am. Gimme some time k. I'm just too used to you being my boyf and I cannot adjust to the friend thing. So, I'll be your best best best friend real soon kk :) *CHEESE* and be happy!

2011-04-22T22:50:00.001+08:00

I really really really miss you. It feels damn lonley when night comes. I replied your text like really harshed cause I missed you too much and I know I can't live without you (literally) and it's just difficult.

And I keep forcing myself to thinking that I can have the freedom to club again! But what... I'd rather someone be unhappy with me clubbing. At least someone cares. Right. Honestly speaking, I'm still stuck at home caught in a delimma if I should go to rebel or not. Hah. How hilarious right. Hah.

All I have now is Khoo. If I lose her. I'd rather die.

2011-04-22T19:32:00.004+08:00

THIS I HOW BORED I AM WHILE WAITING FOR TIME TO PASS TO MEET ANGELA LATER ON. MY GOD. I'M WATCHING PRETTY LITTLE LIARS. Hah, I'm starting a new show when I haven't even finish watching my last season of gossip girl. Damn. What am I. Heh. KKKK, shall continue watching.

2011-04-22T12:57:00.004+08:00

I'll fake a change to make you abhor me."

You know what they say about hope, it brings misery.

This is all over facebook and one of the most viewed video. It's actually pretty sad. And they described everything pretty well... so yeah... here it is...

2011-04-22T06:25:00.001+08:00

Screw all the emo post. Why still stuck down here when people have already moved on. Move on as well. Gogogo.

TODAY'S GOOGLE'S PAGE IS KINDA OF CUTE! HAHA! CAUSE IT'S EARTH DAY ^^

2011-04-21T21:57:00.000+08:00

I want to stop crying and go to bed! Arghhhhh. GOODNIGHT.

2011-04-21T20:17:00.004+08:00

Kkk. I'm going to bed right naow.

2011-04-21T14:43:00.007+08:00

I'm so tired. Again. And forever. Hah. Pakit murdered me today. I wasn't thinking bout you anymore but my dear Pakit asked. Weee. How to not die. You tell me man. I don't know what I should do tonight. Hah, seriously. I don't want to stay at home and start thinking again. Horrible mind I've got here. Actually I can head over to sentosa and look for my parents rightttt! ^^ at least I don't have to be at home

I've been thinking again. Yeah, always thinking. I know. Were we not strong enough or did I give up too fast. I breaks me again. Hah. I think I don't want to forget about anything. If I forget, all the pretty lil memories will be gone. I'd rather have them and be able to think about how nice it feels like to have you around :')
Omg. *runs to get tissue*

School sucks, I screwed up my SS paper. I thought we were suppose to choose one question out of the two when we were suppose to complete the whole piece of shit! Hah! Stupid rightt! Gawd, why am I like that. And then... I did my practical the like thrice!!! Yeah! Bloody hello thrice! The first time was cause I thought that I measured the wrong angle. (Which again I thought I was right) and then I continued with my second time and did the same thing. And then third time I then only realised that I've actually got the whole axis wrongggggg!!!! O-m-gawd. Really ah. Mingshan ah. How are you going to survive????????????

I couldn't find any MV for this :\

2011-04-20T11:54:00.009+08:00

I am gonna go home earlier today! Yay! I'm not feeling too good actually. :SSS or more of chao keng. Hehehe. I just don't feel like wasting my time in school for all the free periods to end then only I can go home.

You feel guilt. I feel sad. The way we think bout each other, it's different.
Gawd. I should stop being like that.

The weather today is a killer man. Darnn.
I want to happier. Ahhhhhhhhh. This is driving me insane and it's killing me.
Be happy be happy be happy be happy. Don't die yet. You still go Amanda Khoo Ai Hui.
(This isn't working much actually. Being positive is more of like self contradicting. Why does life have to suck so much sometimes)

Time check now: 5:58 PM
I've been thinking about why I cannot let go/cannot forget/cannot this cannot that. Hah, I am a girl after all. And this is how a girl would normally behave. But I was the one whom initiated the break up. Why am I so sad? If it's love. Then I think I've missed my chance to really love. BUT NEVERMIND. I AM NOT WEAK. I AM NOT GOING TO BE ALL GAY. I CANNOT BE ALL GAY.
KKK. DAMMIT. I'm still sad. I really don't know what to do. Everything seems terrible. It feels terrible.

I am not ready for tomorrow.

2011-04-19T15:59:00.008+08:00

I've crashed everything with my bare hands.
Memories keep flashing through my mind.
I envy couples now cause I have no one to love neither am I loved.
I want to get over you. I wonder how fine you're doing. I wonder if you'll even think of me.
I thought I've already forgotten. I thought... But I want to.
Why is this so unfair. Why. How am I suppose to let go. Seriously, how did you let go so fast. I think I should just forget bout being friends with you. Cause I don't know how to. You've got your friends to back you up till late. I don't. You can keep yourself occupied. I can't. You don't have school to hold you back. I do. I've made you almost my everything. I'm dying in the inside. I always force myself to sleep so that I will not think. I force myself not to think bout you but I ended up crying. Think bout your smile. How you'll always try to make me not sian. I think bout how you used to assure me that we're gonna last. How you always insist on paying everything. How nice your hugs are. How warm you are. How nice it is to have you sleeping with me so that I won't feel so alone.
I am dying in the inside. I want to tell you how much and want you back.

Even if we get back, I believe a broken relationship can never last. I should just go to sleep.

2011-04-18T21:06:00.005+08:00

I like this picture a lot man, though it's pretty unglam. And I even set it as my profile picture on facebook! Only then I realised that it's quite ugly. Hahaha! (But I still like itttttt)

I'm feeling much better today. Nono. No more emo Mingshan. Who in the right state of mind would want to be all sad and emotional right. Kind of thought of what Deepak said like the whole night... damn it was difficult but yeah... now I'm finally willing to let go man.
My god. I wanna lose weight and grow taller. Ahhh. Darn!
I CAN'T WAIT TO WEAR MY VINTAGE (Y)

2011-04-18T06:45:00.005+08:00

I really wonder if you wanna be bestfriend with me just cause you're afraid to hurt me and don't wanna tell me off. But if we really wanna be bestfriends then I hope we'll tell each other everything. Even myself, I hope I'll tell you everything. I still feel pretty sad bout the fact that we won't be able to be together-together anymore. No more hugs and kisses and all. Awwww. But it's ok! Maybe being best friends we'll have more fun? Well, I hope... I hope we can like do everything together and be comfortable with each other :/ (I'm trying very hard to think positive here :() kkkk. I need to let go. My feelings need to listen to me. They need to fade away. And I need to be happy.

2011-04-17T08:44:00.006+08:00

Why do I still feel so horrible.

2011-04-16T12:24:00.008+08:00

I thought we could be "ok". I guess not. Should I try on or just give up. Thinkthinkthink. Think carefully.
HOW TO DO THIS. OMG. IT'S KILLING ME. I LOOK THROUGH ALL THE PHOTOS OF YOU AND ME. OMG. THINK BACK ALL THOSE SMALL LIL STUFF WE'VE DONE. HOW TO NOT MISS YOU. HOW TO LET GO OF YOU. HOW HOW HOW. ONE MORE THING WHICH SUDDENLY CAME INTO MY MIND. IF I NEED SEX HOW?!!! WLAO WEI. WHY WHY WHY :( I want to go to your place on a random saturday morning and be next to you when you wake up. I've still got so many undone stuff. So, this is heartbroken.

2011-04-15T23:38:00.000+08:00

How I wish that you're still mine

2011-04-15T21:55:00.000+08:00

2011-04-15T13:20:00.002+08:00

:'(((((((((((((((((((((((((((
What to do :(
Now my plan's to act happy then at least make him feel ok then he won't guilty and sad for me. Yeahyeah. I just feel so sad that I'll just cry the whole time. I just wanna sleep forever. Arghhhhhhhhhhhh. SO SAD :(((((((((((((

2011-04-15T08:45:00.001+08:00

I hate this feeling. Everything will end up relating to you you you. So annoying man. Having to know that someone else is gonna have you. It's just so... Hah. Idk.
I can't wait for school to end and the weekends to comeeeeee. So can I can take a break, atleast.

2011-04-14T19:56:00.002+08:00

So broken. Actually I'm pretty speechless.
I wanna act so sick tomorrow so that I can hibernate in my room the whole day.
I kept thinking bout the first time I kiss. That was like one of my most awkward kiss given to someone mannnn. Damnnnn.

2011-04-13T23:38:00.000+08:00

And I thought I wasn't trying

2011-04-10T20:55:00.001+08:00

2011-04-10T15:09:00.000+08:00

I quite like my background ah

Who/what have i become

2011-04-06T07:49:00.007+08:00

I've been trying so hard to be perfect, always worrying how others will look at me, how the others will think of me. How awesome I am, how cool I am. This is just so not me, I used to not care about all of these. And I've been trying too hard to hold on the something that I've actually over tried. In the mid of doing all of these shit, I've lost myself and probably become a monster, someone whom I will abhor if I'm still me...
Who else to blame but myself. Infact I find this rather heartbreaking. I'm actually afraid of myself right now.

It's Khoo's birthday this FRIDAY!!!! Omg. I'm so not ready. Holyholyholy.
I wanna get an ipod really bad man. I've been living without music for... one/two month(s)? And it's killing me. No music = extremely no life. Tell me bout it!

I'm not a big fan of Bieber. But this is rather saddening.

2011-03-31T22:59:00.001+08:00

I think I'm leaving my blog for awhile.

2011-03-30T23:53:00.000+08:00

Sometimes when I start thinking. I think that I'm too childish for him.

2011-03-30T14:58:00.002+08:00

I am having sucha bad day that I want to just die instantly.
I can't wait for Benxing to get back so that he can give me a hug which will reassure that everything's gonna be ok. Even if it's just temporarily.
I am gonna go to the airport tomorrow, I wonder if he expects me to be there or not. Well, I hope not! Cause I wanna surprise him. Hah. Kkkkk, I feel damn down today.
Bye.

~~9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2~~ 1 more day!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

2011-03-29T16:44:00.003+08:00

I've just visted the dentist and cleaned me teeth! Nahh, they're not perfectly white but they're clean!
I'm still thinking if I should get B the redbull cap! What if he's not into it anymore? And if I get him that he wouldn't wear it. Tsk. But I've been searching round for it and even till the extent that I actually approach a stranger and asked where to get the cap. So, should I or not :O
Anyways, I am really tired todayn it's like worst than yesterday! I shouldn't have gone to Geylang and have supper man. It's tiring plus fattening!
I WANNA WATCH SUCKER PUNCH!!!!!!!! Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!
Hoo-kay, I'm like gonna study when I get home. Have to complete my maths assignment and my chinese assignment and my physics tys!!!!!!!! Goshh...
Kkkk, toodles.

Ohyeah! I almost forgot, Yongsheng's damn gay today. He freaked out when he saw a spider on my hair and started to hit my pony tail. He hit it so hard that he hit my head instead. Omg, it was damn stupid. I myself wasn't even freaking out!

~~9 8 7 6 5 4 3~~ 2 MORE DAYS :/

2011-03-28T21:30:00.002+08:00

I am feeling tired again! (As expected)
Gonna head to Geylang to eat durian!!!!!!! Hehehehehehehehehe. Very fattening! I know I know I know! Too bad, I haven't had durian for like, idk how long. So I'm so gonna have it today! Actually it's supper plus durian! Yay!!!! Geylang have got awesome food!!! Yumyum! ^^
I skipped chinese lesson today and went back home early. Yes, I shouldn't have skipped class. At least I went home didn't I!
I hope my awkward-ness between Omar will dissapear :/
Kkkkkkkk, nothing much happened today.I think. Or is it that I'm too tired till I've forgotten everythingggggg. Holy.
Kkk, goodnightyyy!

~~9 8 7 6 5 4~~ 3 more days :/

2011-03-27T16:06:00.002+08:00

OHMYGOD~GOD~GOD~GOD~GOD. THIS FIRST THING I WANNA SHARE IS THAT MY BOYF. HE TALKED TO ME. I mean like, through messages. I MISSED HIM SO BAD. THAT MADE MY DAY AT LEAST ^^ YAY! K, I think I'm being stupid. So, woke up early today. It was damn dreadful to drag myself out of bed. Especially today. I have no idea why either. It was so dreadful till I groaned and moaned a few times, to myself. That was how frustrating it is. But somehow I find it extremely retarded. EXTREMELY I'd say. Benjamin passed me something. It was totally weird. Like... I don't know how to say it. It's like, I've got no feelings for him (not that kind of feelings, where you know. You will feel a butterfly-ish. Nope, just normal friend kinda of feeling) and yet he does so much and I've just... ignore everything he did. Am I just pure evil or what? Heartless. BUT WHAT CAN I DO?! I don't have a thing for him since... idk when. Omg, this is just pure weird that this kind of stuff are happening to me. Had porridge for lunch! UH-HUH UH-HUH! MY FAVOURITE ^^ I am so tired right now that I might just fall asleep any moment. I shall study as much as I can, take another shower and go to bed early. RE-CHARGE MYSELF! Cause there's school tomorrow :L Ciaossssssssssssssssssssssssssss! Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo ~~9 8 7 6 5~~ 4 more days :\ (I have no idea why when I actually start a new paragraph for every part but it will automatically link itself up. This is very frustrating.)

2011-03-26T22:44:00.005+08:00

I'm on the bus right now. Can't wait to get home shower and get some rest! I'm realllyyy exhausted. Completely drained out man. Have been walking for half a day. No, not those slow relaxing kind of walk but those brisk walking kind of walk! Don't ask me why we're walking in such a fast speed. I myself have got no idea either. But prolly because time is never enoughhhhhhh!

So, the first thing me and Khoo did today was to get our piercing!!!!! Wuuhooo! Uh-huh! Uh huh! *jumping up and down, all around!!!!* yeah, my sternum piercing hurt quite a lot man. Really. Naval and hip hurt lesser. A LOT lesser. But oh well, I like my new piercing! Hehe ^^ but one thing. What if I become a piercing freak :( it will be damn bloody ugly. (But it's quite impossibe as well! I'm totally against facial piercing, except septum. And other piercings. And that's all the piercing(s) I want to have) and Khoo finally got her naval! She's damn happy bout it ^^

AND AND AND! We donated to the japan thingy. So, when we donate. We get to take a photo. It's pretty cool actually :)

Went shopping... I STILL COULDN'T FIND THE KIND OF DRESS I WANT!!!!!!! It's so-damn-irritating. Seriously. At least I manage to get my jeans and shoes I guess :/ nahh, it's not satisfying enough. Ohl wait, I finally got my leggings as well! Yay! ^^ plus I got the wrong colour for my jersey :( I want a nude colour. Not a black one. And now I have to go allllllll the way back to bugis's topshop and change my top. Holy shit. Tell me how this isn't tiring!

Ohboy, I've got tuition tomorrow. Ahhhhhhhh!!!! Holyshit, this is going to be god-damn tiring (nahh, I don't mean to damn god) I'll have to get up early. Tskkkkkkk!!!!!!!

I miss my boyf really badly. I want him right now. I want him so bad. I want him to be mine forever! Arghhhhh! I will really kick his ass when he's back. For making me miss him so damn much. I really wanna talk to him real bad. I want him to be my boyf, my bestfriend. My everything. ZOMG. SO GAY :S

~~9 8 7 6~~ 5 more days :L

2011-03-25T22:17:00.004+08:00

Today ah. It's a very sad day leh.
SHIT SHIT SHIT. CANCEL CANCEL CANCEL. No SINGLISH!
Today's a very very sad day for me. Cause my mom disagree for me to work at the nearby cafe. And then afterwards she agreed. But the interview's probably over for me. I wanna get money. I need money. I wanna use my own money.
It's not that I don't get her reason for disagreeing with me working right now. It's just that... I'm old enough to plan all my shit.
And then AGAIN, Omar didn't make it for the movie today. Well, I kind of expected it. So I didn't put my hopes too high this time round = less disappointment. Ah, nevermind. She's my good friend after all. How long can I be mad at her if I really were to be mad at her? Right?

I AM DETERMINE TO LOSE SOME FATS! GO AWAY FATS! I WILL GET RID OF YOU! GOGOGOGOGOGOGO! SHOOOOO OF FROM MINGSHAN! ARGH!
I wanna lose weight. Dammit.

I'm gonna go and get my sternum piercing tomorrow! Wuuuhooooooooo! Am I excited or what? Of course I am excited! Not just excited, ECSTATIC! ^^ Yay yay!

I wanna text benben. Omg. My miss my hunney :((((((((((
~~9 8 7~~ 6 more days :{

2011-03-24T15:34:00.005+08:00

I'm extremely bored right now waiting for my turn to consult a doctor. Hah, I make it sound like I'm real sick. Nahh, I'm just gonna get an mc. Since Mr Zhuo said that he doesn't want anymore parent's letter. So I shall give him an mc (IN HIS FACE! Wuuhooo! Go Mingshan!)
So, I got lost on my way to the poly clinic. Seriously, it's my first time going there and get an mc! What do you expect righttttt. I've wasted so much time. Damn.
I just wanna get my mc asap and then get my ass back home and start studying!

Time check now: 6:38 PM

It's Harry Houdini's birthday today!
So, google's usual home page isn't this
BUTTTTTT! This!
You must be thinking who the heck is Harry Houdini right? Yeah, me too! So I googled him!

1. Harry was born Erich Weiss on March 24, 1874. His father was a penniless rabbi who died when Houdini was 18.
2. As a teenager Harry teamed up with pal Jack Hayman as the “Houdini Bros" and put on a magic show in order to escape poverty.
3. He was nicknamed the ‘The Handcuff King’ after his ability to free himself from jails, handcuffs, chains, ropes and straitjackets.
4. One of Houdini's most notable non-escape stage illusions was making a full-grown elephant and its trainer vanish from the stage.
5. Harry based his stage name on French magician Jean-Eugène Robert-Houdin.
6. He started his movie career in 1906 by acting in a short film called Houdini Defeats Hackenschmidt.
7. Harry died of peritonitis from a ruptured appendix on October 31, aged 52 – nine days after having been punched in the stomach during the Canadian leg of the tour while testing his famed ability to
take body blows.
8. Harry’s last surviving stage assistant Dorothy Young passed away on Sunday at the age of 103.
9. The magician is mentioned in Cat Stevens' song "Ghost Town".
10. Tony Curtis played Harry in the 1953 film 'Houdini'.

AND I AM SO GOING TO GET THIS!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!
NO. NOT THE HAIR. NOT HER TOP. NOT PLASTIC SURGERY TO BE LIKE HER. I WANT HER PIERCING! STERNUM PIERCING! *GEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZ*

~~9 8~~ 7 more days :C
Till Benxing's back. *sighhhhhhhhhhh*

2011-03-23T19:07:00.003+08:00

I'm on the train right now heading home. (After tuition) so, I'm gonna go home and study.
I'll be very disciplined and follow my own rules.
Which are...
1. No usage of computers on weekdays (I'm blogging with my phone. Obviously since I'm on the train right.)
2. No eating after five. (But ofcourse that doesn't mean that I will eat all I can before five. I'll just eat a lil)

I'm still so-god-damn tired after sleeping for 10 hours. Nooooooooooooooo...
K, I will finish up my English and Math and then go to bed.
Hooo-kay. Byebye.

9 8 more days :[

2011-03-22T18:38:00.005+08:00

I think I don't like Adam Khoo's workshop cause I think it's a fake. So I'm skipping school tomorrow and on Thursday as well. Uh-uh, I'm not gonna waste my time.

It's like the first day. And I'm already missing Benxing. Uh-ohhh.

Shall do this count down thing.
9 more days :(

Fucking dreadful. Argh.
I'll go and do my English comprehension.